I know that what I’m about to type may be so shocking as to induce vomiting, anxiety, and general panic, but I have a duty to you, the readers, to report the facts, and so here it goes:

Donald Trump’s new 2020 slogan is stupid. Like, really stupid. It’s a rhymey, cringe worthy type of mantra that will, I’m sure rile up his base and be rammed down our throats for as long as the Dotard in Chief harbors desires to be re-elected. Of course it trades on his most famous promise — to build a southern border wall and have Mexico pay for it. Unsurprisingly, it’s kept for short, and I’m assuming it’s because so many of his supporters only have so many neurons left after having to remember four letters all the time — MAGA.

So without any further ado, here’s Trump’s brand new, freshly squeezed 2020 slogan. I hope you’re ready to be blown away.

Just in case we missed it the first time he rolled-out that idiotically simplistic slogan, he gave it to us again, but this time all by itself. You know, so we could revel in its stupidity a bit longer.

No, your eyes aren’t deceiving you. He really is going with “Build a Wall & Crime Will Fall.” A slogan so basic and reductive any Trumper can get behind it. Sure, forget that the majority of the crimes his wall is supposed to stop — drugs and illegal immigration — don’t even get committed by people crossing the border in the south — that’s what planes, overstaying visas, and regular ports of entry are for. Donny Dumbfuck didn’t let any of those pesky facts stop him from crafting truly the most exquisitely simplistic campaign slogan, though, and thank God he didn’t.

The Internet wasted no time burning Tiny Hands McGee to the ground over it.

Documentary filmmaker Jeremy Newberger set fire to Trump’s dumb slogan with a few tweets, but these two are my favorites.

Nothing like trolling the Troll in Chief with his biggest broken promise…Mexico paying for his tantrum wall.

I’m pretty sure his followers would be crying so loud it might drown out their gun shots.

I’m a huge fan of mocking the president’s fake tan, too.

He missed a chance for a good “Berder King” call back reference, but this is still solid, solid work.

@OhNoSheTwint is one of the consistently funniest, scathing, and on-target mockers of the tangerine twatwaffle. Here she double-dunks on his fat ass.

And we’ll leave on a truly happy and hopeful note. A counter-troll with a reminder that Mueller’s investigation is still ongoing, Trump is still under Federal investigation, and there’s nothing he can do to stop the wheels of justice.

Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook and Instagram, but not Twitter because he has a potty mouth.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.