melania trump mlkAfter Melania Trump totally didn’t plagiarise the First Lady’s 2008 DNC speech last week, because it was really just the same words My Little Pony said, or she borrowed the Tardis and FLOTUS somehow actually stole the speech from her, (or was it Franklin Covey?) everybody started paying a lot more attention to every single detail of her life. Understandable.
When her husband’s campaign insisted on lying to everyone, gaslighting the entire country, selling half a dozen different stories over two days before admitting that yes, it was cribbing, but it wasn’t really Melania’s fault…yadda yadda yadda…They brought it on themselves. No pity. None. Zero. Zilch. Nada.
The following biography originally appeared on her website and in the 2016 RNC program guide:

Born on April 26, 1970 in Slovenia, Melania Knauss began her modeling career at the age of sixteen. At the age of eighteen, she signed with a modeling agency in Milan. After obtaining a degree in design and architecture at University in Slovenia, Melania was jetting between photo shoots in Paris and Milan, finally settling in New York in 1996. source

Except for the teeny little detail that she actually only went to college for all of one year, after which she dropped out go be a model. It turns out the University of Slovenia doesn’t give credit toward graduation for that. But rather than admit anything, someone snuck in and scrubbed all of it. And I mean every last droplet. Mr. Clean would be envious of this job. (It looks like at least one person actually knows how to get something done in that camp.)

Today, Melania posted this message on Twitter:
In true Trump form, deflect, deflect, deflect. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.

Now, visitors to are redirected to, replete with pictures of the Republican presidential nominee’s sprawling golf courses and five-star hotels.

She barely exists now online. Melania is listed on the official website as Trump’s wife and the mother of his children. Part of that may be an attempt to pander to the Evangelicals, to downplay her business interests and show her as simply a wife and mom, although it’s a stretch to envision her making little Trumpie dinners as the submissive little woman. Or maybe she is being punished, because she intentionally sabotaged her speech. Perhaps aliens took over and inserted themselves into her brain. Maybe I need a tinfoil fedora.
Frankly, I have no idea at this point what the hell is going on. I cannot come up with anything that doesn’t sound like a crazy conspiracy theory.
Oh well, if they get desperate for additional biographical information, I found a lot of great stuff here:


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