Dr. Robert Strong is a Real American Hero in the ways that we used to think as kids that the characters in G.I. Joe lived up to that label. Dr. Strong is a psychologist who works for Los Angeles. You have never heard of him. He’s not a household name. But I am hoping that in the annals of time, his name is etched right up there with the likes of Paul Revere, Patrick Henry, and Thomas Paine. I’m not even remotely fucking kidding about that, by the way.

So do I have such a hard-on for Dr. Strong? I’ll tell you why. Because he’s the dude that had a box of horse shit mailed to Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin over the Christmas weekend, that’s why. If ever there was the definition of American values in trollery, it’s what Dr. Strong did. He even had the sense to send two boxes to different places, just in case one was sent to the wrong Steve Mnuchin.

As CBS News reports, Dr. Strong was outraged by the GOP Tax Scam and wanted to use his constitutional freedoms to register his complaints with his government. So, he decided to make an analogy out of an anal byproduct — manure.

Strong, who works with the County of Los Angeles Department of Mental Health, explained that it was intended as a gesture of protest against the GOP’s $1.5 trillion tax overhaul, which was signed into law by President Trump on Friday. Strong said he agrees with critics who believe the policy favors the rich at the expense of the poor and working class.

“I was talking to a friend about the tax bill and we were both complaining about how it’s total horse s***,” Strong said. “And one of our friends who happens to be there owns horses.”  (CBS)

If you ask me, Dr. Strong found the pluperfect target for his prank in Mnuchin. Dude is the poster boy of the rich elite that Trump’s base supposedly despises and yet all manage to worship under the banner of free market capitalism. Secretary Mnuchin is called the “Foreclosure King” in the banking industry for a reason. He made himself even richer in the wake of the 2008 fiscal meltdown foreclosing on homes when perhaps some kind of refinancing might have helped save peoples’ homes.

But just look at Mnuchin and his wife in this photo, below. How are we not supposed to view them as cartoon villains when they pose for pictures like this? Almost everything wrong with American values is encapsulated in this image.

I’m pretttttty sure those are Darth Vader’s gloves she’s wearing.

Of course, people on the right will be unnerved and upset by this. They’ll wring their hands and complain that Dr. Strong’s prank caused the bomb squad to have be sent out. But you know what? Fuck ’em. This is no different than a sit-in at a lunch counter, or picketing the White House. Dr. Strong took a stand and turned horse shit into a political statement.

Considering that Trump and company are turning horse shit into economic policy, I’d say Strong’s point is well taken. Extremely so.

So let’s hoist a glass to our newly minuted hero, Dr. Robert Strong. He deserves a goddamned Congressional Medal of Honor. With a Republican congress he won’t even get consideration, but that’s okay, we have a fake president. Maybe we can just send Dr. Strong a fake medal. It’ll carry as much significance and authenticity as the tiny-fingered, orange twat waffle in the Oval Office, anyway.

Read James’ satirical work on The Pastiche Post, The Political Garbage Chute, and Alternative Facts.


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