It’s time for me to pull out my Republican card for a moment and tell y’all Democrats a secret. There are probably twenty-nine reasons we lost this election, but one stands out to me more than any other, one that we the people can actually control, that is. One reason that the Republicans do not generally deal with, but I watched happen in this election with Democrats to the point that it is still happening even now, almost two months later.

Democrats bitch and moan and nitpick about every goddamn thing there is. Seriously. Republicans will get out and vote for a reality television star, whilst holding their noses and choking back vomit, as long as he has an “R” beside his name today (even if he had a “D” beside it five years ago). They do not care. They will support their party. Not Democrats. Democrats will stay home and not vote. Then Democrats will snipe at each other until there is nothing left but bits and pieces. It’s like vultures circling! I know both sides of this first hand. I voted for Mitt Romney. And I now write a blog and run a page for liberals.

I get my ass chewed so often by other liberals I can barely keep up.

“You shouldn’t run funny stuff right now; it’s a time of mourning.” To be followed a bit later by: “We need more amusing, light-hearted reading. There’s too much depressing news right now.” And when I post a satirical article, I get lectured about fake news when someone can’t comprehend clearly marked satire. Apparently reading a goddamn story with a 6th grade level of understanding is too much to ask for some people.

Okay…well, I can’t please everyone all the time, so guess what?

Today we posted this in a bunch of places. It seems pretty straightforward to me. Donald Trump is going to be the president. Let’s start working together right now to make sure in four years he is not reelected. I could not believe the number of people who were angry with ME for posting this. Apparently by doing so, I have condoned his presidency. No, darlin’s, I have not, bless your pea-pickin’ hearts. But I live in this place called the Real World, and in the Real World, he was elected, there is a majority Republican House and Senate, and his ass is going to be in the Oval Office unless something just wild and crazy comes up.

I didn’t vote for the mother fucker. I didn’t elect him. I didn’t give birth to him. There is not one goddamn thing about Cheeto Satan that is my fault. So why are you taking it out on me? I swear I have never dealt with people who waste more time tearing each other down than they could use to actually do something productive…like all work together and defeat these old, racist sons of bitches. This is not rocket science. It’s common sense. Quit being butthurt about Bernie versus Jill versus Hillary and just move the fuck on already. Please!

Pay attention to some Republicans some time. When their candidate starts acting the fool, what do you hear? SILENCE. It is so infuriating. But at the same time, it is effective. If you want to get angry, go ahead and be mad. But find a way to channel that into something positive. I don’t have Everlast tattooed across my ass, and neither does anyone else.

The infighting in this party has GOT to come to an end. We aren’t all going to agree all the time, but we can sure as shit stop acting like teenagers with raging hormones and actually have productive and meaningful, ADULT conversations, sometimes just agree to disagree, and still work together. If we don’t, we do not stand a chance of coming back from this. Whereas this was supposed to be the election that tore the GOP apart, it is beginning to feel like the beginning of the end of the Democratic Party. That is not a good thing. Please, please do not let this rip us apart. There is far too much work to be done today, much less two and four years from today. We are going to need each other more than ever.

And if you don’t feel in the mood for humor, for the love of all that is holy, just keep scrolling.


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