I support Bernie Sanders. I’m not a Tea Bagger. Stop fucking telling me I am.

Clinton supporters throwing around Tea Bagger insults is laughable.

Hi, Hillary Supporters! It’s your friendly neighborhood foul-mouthed comedian. Can I make just one, small, simply request?

Stop fucking calling Bernie Sanders supporters Tea Baggers.

Look, I know you guys really want your candidate to win. We want our candidate to win. And sure, politics is ugly business, but referring to Sanders supporters — who you will all need if your candidate bests ours — as Tea Partiers as some kind of knee-jerk reaction to criticism of Hillary is unhelpful, and frankly pretty stupid. I won’t deny that there are a few threads of the narratives of  both Tea Partiers and Sander Supporters — a distaste for the status quo and a deep feeling that we’ve been heading in a shitty direction for decades — but that is pretty much where the similarities end. Unless you count the fact that we’re all human, but that’s almost as dumb as calling us Tea Baggers.

In case you forgot, we all helped elect President Obama. All of us. It’s kind of sad and telling that because someone — me in this instance — says that he isn’t happy about Hillary offering to compromise on late term abortions that you are so quick to label that person as a Tea Bagger. We all know how much an insult that is to people with intelligence. And it’s just categorically false.

Tea Partiers want to shrink the government into nothingness. Sanders supporters want to use the government to ensure the working class is protected from the effects of untethered capitalism. Hillary supporters, I thought, wanted that too. But heaven forefend we point out where she seems to align with Republican interests. How dare we point out her willingness to wish-wash and triangulate her way through an election. That makes us Tea Baggers?

We’re not Tea Baggers for having unwavering convictions. We’re not Tea Baggers for having solid convictions. The Hillary supporters who are calling us Tea Baggers are stripping all the context of criticism away. They’re focusing solely on the “W.” Which is fine. It’s just that they’re arguing in favor of a politician closer to “W” than “FDR” is all. And that doesn’t sit well with some of us. Context matters. Intentions matter. To behave as if the Tea Party and Sanders supporters are the same because of very basic, shallow similarities says more about Hillary supporters than they’d probably care to admit.


You have to stop calling us all sexist or Republican Tea Baggers because we criticize your candidate. It makes no sense. The real Tea Baggers and real sexists will be saying much worse and with zero evidence to back their claims up. If you get your candidate elected, are you prepared for the onslaught of shit that people outside her political beliefs will sling at her? Because in a primary election, it’s totally appropriate to weigh each candidate on a whole host of issues, and to try and decide if they should get your vote or not. But if Hillary wins, you better believe the Republican, right-wing machine is going to go fucking ballistic on her, and you’re probably going to want all us Bernie “Tea Bagger” supporters to help you defend her against the baseless shit, right?

So if that’s the case, then take your lumps. Hillary is not perfect. Neither is Bernie. Feel free to criticize him in any way you see fit. Just stop pretending as if when some of us point out things Hillary has said or done in the past that we find distasteful somehow discredits us liberals, or makes us sexist Tea Baggers. How incredibly dumb. If the shoe were on the other foot, would you want to be called a Tea Bagger?

Or better yet, since you support Hillary, do you want all the Bernie fans to start referring to you as Republicans? Because here’s the thing, Hillary’s votes in the Senate may have been 93% in lock step with Sanders, but that other 7% belies a much deeper disconnect. And beyond all that, tell me how her foreign policy goals are much different than a 90’s era Republicans’.

How about we make a deal: we’ll stick to critiquing legitimate things about Bernie and Hillary. We’ll stop implying that Bernie supporters are left-wing Tea Baggers. And we’ll stop assuming that Hillary is bought and paid for before she even gets in the White House. We’ll judge them on the merits of their words and actions.

Or you know, keep calling us Tea Baggers and then have a major sad when we don’t have your back anymore. Because “Go team Democrats!” Right?

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