I Just Found The Perfect Product For Protecting People From Trump’s Policies!

Trump's Policies will be bad for certain people, but we can help.

A lot of people are, probably justifiably, really freaked-the-fuck-out about Donald Trump being our next president. After all, this is the guy who started his campaign by riding an escalator down from his penthouse apartment to declare all Mexicans as rapey, murderfaced drug dealers. Then there’s the “extreme vetting” of Muslims and putting them on a registry. Oh, and all that crazy racist crime stat stuff he was retweeting during the campaign too.

Right, and I almost forgot about the fact that actual white nationalists endorsed him. And so did David Duke, a former KKK grand wizard. So yeah, I totally get it. For certain people it could be a rough four years/however long it takes for the Donald to Trump himself out of the White House as the first president impeached and removed from office.



Fear not though, American citizens! For I have discovered in my Internet travels a product that will keep all those people safe from the forces of Trump’s discrimination. I’d like to present that product to you right now, if you please.

[su_spoiler title=”Click Here To Reveal The Wonderful Product!” style=”fancy”] white-paint-interior-walls[/su_spoiler]

I have no doubt in my mind if we just get this product into the right peoples’ hands, they’ll be safe as safe can be. All hail President Trump!


Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.

More from James Schlarmann

Steve Bannon Invites Donald Trump Jr. On Fishing Trip For Just The Two Of Them

After a rough week in the headlines, Donald Trump Jr. gets to...
Read More