#DumpStarWars Means ‘Star Wars: Rogue One’ Will Be A-Hole Free. However Will I Survive?

If you're a Nazi and you're joining the #DumpStarWars movement, allow us all to just say from the bottom of our hearts, "Thank you."

That same “rugged individualist” group who hates political correctness and safe spaces is throwing a tantrum over them, well, needing Star Wars to be a safe space. Just like when they boycotted “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” last year because they thought an anti-male message was being rammed down their throats (apparently a strong, female lead is an attack on masculinity and not a championing of female badassery to them), the alt-right, Trump loving boycotters of the new Star Wars film are doing so because they think the screenwriter as an “anti-white” agenda.

They’ve got a shiny new hashtag for it too, #DumpStarWars.

Nothing would make me happier than if the “alt-right” really is going to #DumpStarWars. Why in the hell would I want to share oxygen space with Nazis, let alone see a movie I’m super-excited about with them? Stay home alt-right wimps. The rest of us will enjoy “Star Wars: Rogue One” without you.

I don’t know whether to roll my eyes so far back into my head they fall through a rip in the space-time continuum and I end up in the Sarlacc Pit…or just laugh at these silly fools who’d give up a chance to see what looks like a pretty amazing Star Wars movie because of their obsession with preserving and defending whiteness.  As a white person I find that comical and sad. Kind of like voting for a guy who has no experience in government and is clearly going to focus more on himself and his business interests than being a good world leader. But hey, what do I know?

What got these angry Nazi Nerds upset is that Chris Weitz, who wrote the script for “Rogue One,” dared to remind the world that in the Star Wars universe, the Empire was an evil organization that hated alien life forms. It’s always been well-accepted cannon and the dudes in Stormtrooper armor were part of a group that was essentially “racist” against any non-human entity.

As written in the Independent, Weitz tweeted this Star Wars “fact” before the election:

“Please note that the Empire is a white supremacist (human) organization,” he tweeted back in November. “Opposed by a multi-cultural group led by brave women.” (source)

Weitz is, of course, right. And again, any Star Wars nerd worth his or her salt knows the xenophobia of the Empire was always a strong thematic undercurrent. Han Solo and Chewbacca met each other when Han was rescuing his lifelong best friend (RIP, Han) from Imperial enslavement. Chewie owed Han a “life debt” for being saved from the slavers bearing Imperial insignias. But that doesn’t matter to the alt-right. They just think those mean ol’ Hollywood Libtards are attacking their totally normal view that being white somehow makes them better then everyone else.

Because logic, for them, exists in a galaxy far, far away from their own.

You know, for a group of people who like to mock liberals over the idea of “safe spaces” — a concept even a lot us on the left find problematic — alt-right people sure do need their spaces safe, don’t they?

They only cloister together on the web in spaces they feel they can control and dominate. Just watch any time one of their big Twitter accounts is banned. They freak out and threaten to mass exodus, to which the rest of us always reply, “Yes, please.” They only watch or listen to news sources they think aren’t lying to them. Honest news sources with integrity and great reputations for their journalistic ethics.

You know, sites like Breitbart and Fox News.

Honestly, their projection is comically apparent to everyone who isn’t ass-deep in the alt-reight (see what I did there?) movement. If you think about it, their so called “rural areas” are safe spaces too, or at least they think of them that way. Hence all the “we get ignored by the liberal elites on the coast” bullshit. But could anyone really be blamed for ignoring a group that gets caught up in a snit every time a movie franchise decides to emphasize themes they don’t agree with?

You hear them kvetch about freedom of speech. They claim being banned from Twitter is a violation of their right to free speech, and in some ways it is. It’s just that we’ve all agreed that private companies have a right to censor users of their platforms. But for all their high-minded defense of hate speech as free speech, heaven forbid an artist want to express themselves from a liberal point of view.




I couldn’t possibly care less if a bunch of racist, misogynist white supremacists #DumpStarWars. Frankly, I try to put myself into situations that involve being around neo-Nazis as little as possible anyway. They’re really just doing me a favor by staying the hell out of the theater, right? I find it really hilarious that they think they’re a large enough group to somehow impact Disney’s bottom line by boycotting the film. The film will still make hundreds of millions of dollars and be tremendously popular, but it’s not like being on the losing end of popular sentiment is anything new to them, is it? It’s how they get into the White House these days.

The Force is truly with us all if its keeping racist a-holes out of the theater for us.


Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.

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